[Enclosure]

Derby

Oct. 25^th.— 92.

My dear old friend

I should have written to you much sooner but waited for a frank, as Erasmus⁹ promises at the same time to send you a scrawl,— I wish him to send you a subpœna to Derby, where you well know I shall at any time be very glad to see you or your’s.— I hope you will come next summer & see yr. Cousin Sumner;¹⁰ you who are now a gentleman, at large, & not confined at home all the year, as I am, should not neglect your old Elston friends;—if I were Cousin Sumner, I believe I should strike you out of my will for not coming down this last summer!—she expects an annual kiss from you at least;—whether your mouth is drawn on one side or not,—you must mind on which side you approach lest you should kiss her ear. I am glad to find your spirits are so good, as to joke upon yr. infirmity of having yr. mouth drawn a little to one side, my next door neighbour, a young man to you, I suppose not 50 has had just such a seizure, which he is slowly recovering from, you say the only inconvenience you find, is that you cannot now whistle to amuse yourself, & he says all the inconvenience he finds, is, that he cannot blow out his candle, when he goes into bed. If yr. Doctor says you are well, how dare you think to the contrary? The success of the French against a confederacy of kings gives me great pleasure, & I hope they will preserve their liberty, & spread the holy flame of freedom over Europe.¹¹ For my part I go on as usual to practice physic, and to write books,— I sold a work called “The Botanic Garden” for 900£ to Johnson the bookseller near S^t. Paul’s, it is a poem; perhaps you may borrow it from some circulating library; it is in two parts and sold for 1—13—0—¹²   I intend to publish another work next in prose wh. will be chiefly on physic, I fear it will not sell so well as the last.¹³ The worst thing I find now is this d—n’d old age, which creeps slily upon one, like moss upon a tree, and wrinkles one all over like a baked pear.—but I see by your letter that your juvenility will never fail you; you’l laugh on to the last, like Pope Alexander, who died laughing; on seeing his tame monkey steal to bedside, and put on the holy Tiara, the triple crown, wh. denotes him king of kings.¹⁴ Now M^r. Pain says that he thinks a monkey or a bear, or a goose may govern a kingdom as well, & at a much less expense than any being in Christendom, whether idiot or madman, or in his royal senses;¹⁵ adieu dear Citizen from thy affectionate equal

E. Darwin

M^rs. Darwin & all here beg to be remembered to you & send compliments to M^rs. Dixon.¹⁶ Brother John is returned to Carlton, & preaches furiously, he prays as usual, and advises his parish, & makes up differences & advises the poor as he used to do— He’ill hold the Devil a good tugg, I hope yet, for there are few such clergy to be found. I don’t believe amongst the 8000 French parsons, wh. you are now feeding in London, & wh. France has spewed out of her mouth, that you can find one equal to your old playfellow at Carlton Scroop.¹⁷ Pray give my comply^s., to all yr. sons. Mry. Day. is a teacher at M^rs. Ton’s boarding school at Chesterfield, and Susannah is going to be governess in a family near Chesterfield. & seem both very happy in their situations.¹⁸